Saturday, April 30, 2016


Went on a Winduebridge family vacation to Gatlinburg. The views were incredible, the weather was lovely, the go carts were fast and dangerous. It was great. We enjoyed everything from Passover festivities to footlong corn dogs.


Sage has so many "loveloves" (full size fleece blankets) that she now refers to them by color "da brown wan" "puhpel wan" "pink wan".

And sometimes she wants to carry them all at once. Something I need to get a picture of.

Monday, April 11, 2016

Quotable Winduebridges.

We had an 8am rehearsal for Marley's violin performance. It was in the auditorium at Dater, where the students are congregated before class begins. The chaperones were keeping the unintentional audience quiet while the violinists played their songs. After every song the audience clapped. Sage, Solo and I were sitting to the side and every time the audience clapped, Sage would wait till they tapered off and then loudly yell "Gooo Nonny!"  (go Marley).


Me: "I wish I had a candy factory like Willy Wonka. I've always wanted lickable wallpaper."
Toby: "All wallpaper is lickable."

Katie: I'm going to give this flower to my mommy and say "a pretty flower for a pretty lady." Because she is pretty and because my teacher told me I had to.
Aimee: Every day is 'Favorite Character' for Meme because she always dresses up like her favorite character. Herself.

Bunch of comedians, those Duebs.

Friday, March 25, 2016

To miss understanding.

Humans long for ease and luxury, even at the price of slavery. "This is what I am willing to sacrifice to get the things I want; to be the places I long to go to."

Wherever I go or whatever it is that happens: I suffer from a grievous and pervasive lack of contextual understanding.

I cannot understand what is best because I am always focused on what seems better. I am thankful that God has sent me a helper.
That when I fail me, there is a calmness within that expresses with clarity what I am suffering, to the one who knows best. The one who knows me, because I am His creation.

The people weren't happy about the hard times they were having. The Lord heard what they were saying. It made him burn with anger. Then the Lord sent fire on them. It blazed out among the people. It burned up some of the outer edges of the camp.  The people cried out to Moses. Then he prayed to the Lord. And the fire died down.  Some people who were with them began to long for other food. Again the people of Israel began to cry out. They said, "We wish we had meat to eat. We remember the fish we ate in Egypt. It didn't cost us anything. We also remember the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions and garlic. But now we've lost all interest in eating. We never see anything but this manna!"  When the dew came down on the camp at night, the manna also came down.  Moses heard people from every family crying. They were sobbing at the entrances to their tents. The Lord burned with hot anger. So Moses became troubled. He asked the Lord, "Why have you brought this trouble on me? Why aren't you pleased with me? Why have you loaded me down with the troubles of all of these people?  "Am I like a mother to them? Are they my children? Why do you tell me to carry them in my arms? Do I have to carry them the way a nurse carries a baby? Do I have to carry them to the land you promised? You took an oath and promised the land to their people of long ago.  "Where can I get meat for all of these people? They keep crying out to me. They say, 'Give us meat to eat!' "Is this how you are going to treat me? If you are pleased with me, just put me to death right now. Don't let me live if I have to see myself destroyed anyway."
Numbers 11:1-2, 4-6, 9-13, 15 NIRV

Thursday, March 24, 2016

What it is.

Sometimes love doesn't look the way we think it should or the way we want it to.


Not having the last word.
Leveling up your son's character instead of your own.
Not giving an opinion or advice.
Not pushing for what's "fair".
Maintaining eye contact on a face *just in case* they happen to look up and want to see that you're paying attention.
Being late.
Being early.

... is love.

It's all so confusing and difficult to do in the moment.

Sunday, March 20, 2016

Oh my... Sage. Two.

This girl puts me to work and keeps me there.

Her smile though. Incredible.

She had a great twinkle twinkle little star party and she and her siblings and cousins all serenaded us with singing and dancing and violining.

Pickles, tomatoes, cake... Presents... An audience. Pretties (princesses). Her favorite things.

She really loves her grandparents. They're like celebrities. She's such a special and friendly thing. And wild.

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Judge not

Jackson : What's your name? I can't remember.

Solomon: Solomon! Don't you remember me from Jackson's birthday party?!

Jackson: I'm Jackson.

Solomon: Oh.

Thursday, February 11, 2016

Part One- rough

In the only kingdom there is a town. It is not exceptional, being of no particular significance in regards to time, place, beauty, value, or receptiveness. Moments both raucous and somnolent come and pass. People are, like the town, ordinary. The law of the land is determined by the majority. What is held by most to be true, is. What is held by few is irrelevant at best and illegal at worst.

Yesterday, in this town, a woman in a dirty dress and a red shawl crossed a threshold. The woman was a prostitute. She did not use her body except to secure those things necessary for survival. She was not beautiful, nor proud, and she had many children. Her children were old enough to reason and to walk though not enough to do much work and of poor temeperments besides. No one felt sorry for the foul mouthed children, so no one paid them much attention.

Two days ago she did not find a way to feed her children. Yesterday, the same. She did not find the means to feed her children. Whether she could not or just did not, I do not know. And this woman in the dirty dress and wearing the red shawl crossed the threshold of another woman's house. The other woman was in a back room, tending to some household task, the likes of which is irrelevant. From where the other woman was she could not see the door, nor could the woman in the red shawl see her. All the red-shawl woman saw was bread on the table. So she crossed into the room and seized it.

But the task in the back room had been attended to and the other woman came upon the scene. She plainly saw the red shawl woman stealing her bread. The bread she had intended to cut and feed her and her husband with. She was a practical woman and had bought enough bread for the meal for two. She came upon the red shawl woman in a righteous fury and seized her arms, pulling the bread free and being practical made sure to place it safely on the table before returning to the task of holding the woman who had made to steal her family's bread.

"That's mine and you won't have it!"
"Please! I wanted only to feed my children!"
"And I wanted to feed myself and my husband and so I bought this bread."
They struggled against each other. One to break free and the other to hold on at least long enough to instill a decent sense of shame into the red shawl woman. And  though they struggled hard enough to end up in the street and making a great deal of noise, neither felt shame. Too busy in their struggle, they didn't notice the crowd that tightened around them. From the shouts of indignation and protest from the red shawl woman and the practical woman with the bread the crowd discerned the story.

"Seems to me that it would be a sin to let children starve." A face said to another face.
"And she only had her breakfast a few hours ago and still begrudging those fatherless children a meal." Said a face loud enough so many of the other faces could hear.
"It ought to be a crime, that sort of greediness!" A face yelled.
"Yeah!" A face agreed loudly.
"Yeah!" Many more faces called out.
Two men stepped into the middle of the fight and one pulled the red shawl woman away and the other man pulled the practical woman away. Ending the fight but not the unrest.
"We think you ought to feel ashamed for not feeding those children."
"But... I don't even know this woman and she just..." The practical woman was incredulous at the accusation but was cut off in her denial.
"You have plenty more to eat and look at you, thick in the middle. And this woman in red is a pole. She looks hungry and she has children that are starving." A face said with a tone of disapproving.
"But she..." The practical woman tried but the man who held the woman in the red shawl released her and lifted a hand to stop the flow of her words and said with a gentle voice, "It is the duty of the community to feed the helpless."
"But no one else..."
"I say we kill her!" A face called from the back of the crowd.
"We don't need the depth of her greed in our town!"
"Kill her!"
The man who held the practical woman's arm yanked it even harder behind her back. This man himself had stolen his brother's shovel, when his brother had bought a new one. And somewhere inside him he still wasn't sure it had been right, even though he hadn't had a shovel at all himself before.
"Kill her!" A face called who just that morning seen the starving children in question and had given them an earful because they'd been blocking the pathway and using foul language where just anyone could hear it.
Before the practical woman could offer protest or call out to her husband or to anyone who might save her, the crowd leaned in on her. Some ripping at her hair and some at her dress, causing her harm and showing their disapproval for her greedy behavior.
They started to gather stones to use against her.


Friday, February 5, 2016

Recent doings.

I'm watching: Brooklyn 9-9, Sword Art Online, Grimm.

I'm reading: The Mercy Thompson series.

I'm working on: a faerie terrarium light.. Thing...

I'm reading through Exodus again.

Bob is playing poker and constantly working on growing the business where he works.  The Superbowl is at hand.

Solo is playing basketball and doing gymnastics and playing Guild Wars 2 with me.

Marley is working on violin and doing gymnastics and loves to go outside, whatever the weather.

Sage continues to be the cutest and peskiest pixie of all time.  She loves "pretties" (princesses), singing twinkle twinkle, watching Wishenpoof. 

Murphy is mad at me because I moved his couch.
Lulu loves me no matter what I do.