Monday, July 30, 2012

Marley comments on Princes and the Fall/Snakes

The other day at Aimee's princess birthday party Marley and Grandpa Bob had a conversation that went something like this.
Marley: Are you a prince?
Gpa Bob: Well I use to be but I lost my prince hat and shoes.
Marley: Oh... That is a weird story.
.
At bedtime we were reading Genesis when the serpent is tempting Eve and after I read about her (Eve) giving in and eating the fruit) Marley says, "If that was me I would not eat that fruit. I would step on that snake."
That is what I get for reading Genesis 3 and Rikki Tikki Tavi to her in the same week.
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I was watching some of the Duebber kids today and I gave them all slices of cheese. Some of them are food-inhalers and some of them are food-hoarders. Marley (a food-hoarder) was prone to a Katie attack. Katie swiped a piece of Marley's cheese and shoved it into her mouth (hence settling the matter with a firm and irrefutable claim on the cheese)  (which was greeted by a wale from Marley). Then Aimee said, "It's ok. You can have a piece of my cheese Marley."
Evil is natural and goodness is not. The proof is in the cheese.
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Solomon thinks every morning is a food scavenger hunt. Mostly because he stashes food for himself in accessible but hidden places the night before. Sick.

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Marley & early literacy / college updates

I cannot tell you what a privilege it is to be allowed to help Marley take her first steps toward being a reader. She knows her alphabet, can identify all letters, knows well their sounds and most of their lower case forms. She delights in drawing R's, H's, Q's. She is not a big fan of the letter S yet. She can write her own name even if the Y is questionable.

Being able to read will go well with her flare for the dramatic and for story-telling.

Here is a story she told to me tonight. She had a green and orange "cape" tyed which she was flourishing one way and another as she told the story. I wrote it down in short hand so it isn't  word for word but it is the exact story.

I live in a swamp and it is very beautiful. My prince is captured by the bad guy with evil spells. The bad guy took my prince to a big forest. I use my swamp powers and turn the bad guy into a swan for ever and ever. For 5 weeks.
Then the best thing in the world happened. The best thing in the swamp. The princess had a pet. It was a little tiny bee in the palace and there was a bad spell. The princess and the bee fell asleep and were happily ever after. Then the best thing ever happened. The bad guy turned back into a swan until it stopped.
-Marley Winslow

She didn't inform me if there was a working title or anything. She couldn't really tell me anything about her hopes for publishing either. One step at a time.
.....

So in the midst of struggling with a household of virus I have had a few life changing or at least thought-altering moments this week.

I had an appointment with my doctor that surprised me. I always expect a clean bill of health and no complications. I *DO* have complications. Now I have been suggested to change current behaviors and to seek out a specialist. I won't go into actual detail but I will say that no I am not pregnant nor am I in any mortal danger. But I never thought I could be physically vulnerable. A stupid thought, I know.
...

I got a phone call from the Child Development Center. The one I have been praying for a spot to open for Solomon. They said for him to be put on a priority list I would have to enroll Marley, which I was unwilling to do without any actual assurance that Solomon would get in too. It would obligate me financially if I did. So I said no to enrolling Marley and had them keep Solomon on the regular waiting list and was advised there would likely be a 6-9 month wait.

Ok, time to get the back up plans rolling a little faster right? Nope.

Then without any additional effort on my part aside from prayer, the center called me back a week later and said that they had an opening for Marley AND Solomon.

Praise God!

Now I have a meeting with the teachers to do paperwork and tour the facility. I.am.nervous. It has been 4 years of me being a stay at home mom. I am not nervous about being an adult without a trail of kids but the idea of leaving my kids somewhere (even though we will be in the same building) is absolutely... terrifying. The fact that they will be in different classrooms is the worst part by far.

I am seperating them from myself and each other. It constricts my throat to think about it, I get a headache in my temple. Each decision made leads to 5 more questions.

God, I pray that you make the path before me clear and that You would guide my steps. Allow me to think clearly and remain positive, filled with the power of the peace that passes understanding. Remind me God that you have given my life purpose and that purpose includes the responsibility I have to my two blessings, my children but is not limited to that. God steady me and be my rock. If I have to make hard decisions God please guide me to choose the things that will glorify You and ultimately lead to the salvation of my children and husband through Jesus Christ.
Amen

Monday, July 23, 2012

I love talking to someone who not only does not listen to what I say, they also don't listen to what they say.

Marley: uh oh. If we use the last two eggs for cookies we won't have any left.
Me: That is why we need to have chickens. So we can collect their eggs and always have some.
Marley: You don't need chicken for cookies.

Friday, July 20, 2012

Since "Isaiah" is Solomon's favorite word today.


He tends his flock like a shepherd: 
    He gathers the lambs in his arms 
and carries them close to his heart; 
    he gently leads those that have young.


Isaiah 40:11



Why do you complain, Jacob?
    Why do you say, Israel,
“My way is hidden from the Lord;
    my cause is disregarded by my God”? 
28 
Do you not know?
    Have you not heard? 
The Lord is the everlasting God,
    the Creator of the ends of the earth. 
He will not grow tired or weary, 
    and his understanding no one can fathom. 
29 
He gives strength to the weary 
    and increases the power of the weak.
30 
Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall; 
31 
but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength. 
They will soar on wings like eagles; 
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.


Isaiah 40: 27-31

Bible Gateway needs to send their emails at lunchtime


So I get this email every day from Bible Gateway with a Bible verse. A few days ago I woke up early for no apparent reason, rolled over in a fog of what-the-heck-why-am-I-awake and grabbed my phone in case, maybe I had missed some urgent buttcrack-of-dawn phone call. No calls, checked my Bible Gateway email because I hate icons sitting in my notifications tray and found this verse:

Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

I kid you not. I could not fall back asleep. I was terrified.
And the whole rest of the day I spent waiting to see what was going to befall me or my kids. I am not sure what my point is. 1. Don't wake up early? 2. Don't check your email before you brush your teeth? 3. Bible Gateway is guilty of inciting public-ish panic? (I told Bob about my fear, that makes it public).

Anyway, not sure I have a point, just telling you how it happened.
Boom, Boom, ain't it great to be crazy?

(PS. Nothing actually bad happened. Unless you count Solomon coloring his hair green, but that wasn't bad, it was awesome).

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Comfortable

Was laying in my bed with the darlings. Just relaxing at the 8 O' clock hour. Solomon was completely content to lay there and drive his toy car over my leg over and over.

Monday, July 16, 2012

Did we sign up for marriage counseling?

Solomon, Bob and I *chewing dinner*
Marley: Sometimes you guys fight.
Me: Who does? Daddy and I?
Marley: Yeah.
Me: But who wins?
Marley: Nobody wins. You need to win together right?
Me: But who do you think would win in a wrestling match?
Marley: Ayy-heeem. You need to answer my question.

Friday, July 13, 2012

My 3 year old girl

I just said goodnight to my 3 year old girl for the last time. Tomorrow I will deal with a sugared up partied out 4 year old. But for now I will just enjoy overhearing her pray to God "Thank you for making this world."

Thank you God for Marley.

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Back in the saddle again... they better validate my pony-parking.

So in this blog post I said I would be at some point returning to college. That time has arrived. It is, somehow, someway the year 2012. JULY 2012 too... not some lesser month like.. February. IT IS JULY. HALFWAY THROUGH THE FREAKING YEAR. Wasn't it just December 2011? Did I have a birthday?  Did someone make me a cake? Where did all that time go?

Sorry, got a little distracted there.
Also I am sure someone made me a cake and I am sure it was delicious, please make me another one... FOR MARLEY'S BIRTHDAY BECAUSE IT IS FREAKING JULY.

*cough*
So I have resubmitted my application to Cincinnati State, been re-accepted, all my transcripts have been transferred and accounted for, my class audit has been... audited, FAFSA submitted, tax forms submitted, adviser seen. So what is left to do? Well, first and foremost amongst the in-need-of-conquering-tasks is what to do with my darlings. The sunshine and moonlight of my life need to be safe, stimulated, enriched and cherished while I am busy reading overpriced textbooks and praying that my Blackboard access works.

So what is my plan? I have to have a plan right? Here is one a bunch of people would hate. Prayer. That is the plan. There is a program at Cincinnati State for children. A good program... with a waiting list. I have been told there will be a spot for my (ACK) 4 (4!?!?) year old but that I would have to wait and see about my 2 (2!?!??!) year old. I have applied for the waiting list and now I am going to pray. Flat on my face, sucking air through the carpet praying to God to make this work. Why?

Because I want to go to school. I want to follow through with the plan I have made. I am genuinely excited about the prospect of doing ... what I plan to do. I find it difficult to publicly state my educational intentions. I fear discouragement during this  vulnerable moment in my life. I want people to encourage me and tell me that I have set attainable goals for myself and that what I am doing is worthwhile and pleasing to God.

I am going to go to Cincinnati State to obtain an "Associate of Arts degree" and then transfer to UC to get a Bachelor of Education concentrating in middle education. There I said it.

So now I pray.